The Ness and Alisa Funtime Show (Fake Spinoff of Fake Show Collab)

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#*''Mansion on Lockdown''
 
#*''Mansion on Lockdown''
 
#*''Lili Meets BTS''
 
#*''Lili Meets BTS''
  +
#*''The Return of Wrath'' (basically a re-hash of ''The Return of Slade'')
 
UNDER CONSTRUCTION
 
UNDER CONSTRUCTION
   

Revision as of 01:53, 6 August 2022

6

Note: You are allowed to add any reason or edit this page, but DO NOT VANDALIZE. Also, any character is welcome in this show, so knock yourselves out! Thank you!

The Ness and Alisa Funtime Show
[[Image:|330px|center|]]
This spin-off is definitely not fun at all.
Genre: Action
Comedy
Black Comedy
Off-color humor
Running Time: 25 minutes
Country: United States
Canada
France
Release Date: April 8, 2022 - Present
Network(s): HBO Max (US broadcast)
Adult Swim (US syndication)
Fox Showcase (Australia)
Sky Comedy (UK broadcast)
Channel 4 (UK syndication)
RTV, NET & SCTV (Indonesia)
Netflix (International)
TV Tokyo, WOWOW & independent TV stations (Japan)
Astro Warna, TV3 and TV9 (Malaysia)
Distributed by: Warner Bros. Television Distribution
Seasons: 7
Episodes: 157


The Ness and Alisa Funtime Show is a spinoff of The Crazy-Ass Group Show: The Series, Television Presentation.

Summary

Ness and Alisa move to Miami, Florida and therefore get their own TV show, as they spend their free time with other members of the group in their mansion when they are not fighting villains.

Why It Sucks

  1. Like the main show itself, many of the plots are random, convoluted, and/or lack any originality whatsoever.
    • "The Olive Garden Banquet" is nothing more than a rehash of "Feast of McDonald’s" from "The Loona and Kat Show" (another spin-off), but Olive Garden replaces McDonald’s.
    • "Lili Visits Blaze Pizza" is a rehash of "Caillou Goes to the Circus" and "Doki Goes to Pizza Hut" (an episode from the main show).
    • "Lucky Chloe's Chaotic Train Ride" is a rehash of the 1959 Terrytoons short "Foofle's Train Ride".
    • "Jin and Heihachi" is a rehash of "Paintbrush Loves Blood Moon" from the main show.
    • "Mayor Gumball" is a rehash of "Mayor Knuckles" from Sonic Boom.
    • "My Big Fat Lili" is a rehash of "Big Fat Brush" and "Maddie the Fat Bitch" from the main show.
    • "News of the Queen Album" is a rehash of "Killer Queen" from Family Guy but only the plot with Brian and Stewie
  2. Most of the characters act out of character compared to their original counterparts as they haven't improved from the main show or the movie. Although some are still likable.
    • Ness became an annoying and perverted teenager who is obsessed with Alisa to the point where he idolizes her. Not only that but he can tend to be shouty to the point where he spams PK Fire for no reason at all.
    • Alisa Bosconovitch became brain dead and a whiny brat who defends Ness even if he did something wrong, when things don't get her way she yells in a high-pitched voice. She can also tend to be very egotistical at times too.
    • Paula Jones/Polestar became a toxic Aespa stan who condemns people that don't like the South Korean girl group. To the point of blasting their songs on the speakers for nothing.
    • Jeff Andonuts now hates India and is racist towards Indians as he treats them like they are supervillains.
    • Prince Poo, while tolerable, is mostly portrayed as a bumbling idiot.
    • Pokey Minch is now a perverted, creepy boy, who wants to rub woman's private areas, watches pornography, and masturbates all the time.
    • Nicole Watterson became an ultra emotional dingus who's emotions change too frequently. She has her moments where her life is great with no flaws, but then she starts getting depressed and ultimately upset at times as well as doing more stupider stuff.
    • Lucas from Mother 3 is now a whiny brat who watches Toy Surprise and Elsagate videos every single time.
    • Kumatora is a party animal.
    • Pikachu is now a psychopath who shoots electricity at anyone for no reason at all.
    • Kirby, while likable, is the show's punching bag.
    • Captain Falcon is now a, believe it or not, a pedophile who stalks children and bullies 13-year-olds on Social Media. He is also an asshole towards Alisa.
    • Mira from Mirakel is now a Koreaboo, despite being Swedish.
    • Lili De Rochefort became a female version of Perfect Peter from Horrid Henry, but worse.
    • Asuka Kazama became an arrogant person who doesn't even care for anyone's safety, and she is way too hip and trendy.
    • Lucky Chloe became even more annoying than she originally was, not only that, but she always won’t shut up about everything that she likes and will lash out at anyone who tells her to stop.
    • Ninten from EarthBound Beginnings, introduced in this spinoff, became a sociopath who wanted revenge just because he didn't make it into Smash.
    • Lidia Sobieska, introduced in this spinoff, is now a useless character who is obsessed with twerking and would often visit a strip club.
    • King from Tekken, introduced in this spinoff, is now a bland character with no personality. In some episodes, he doesn't even do anything.
    • Sayonara from Just Dance 2018, introduced in this spin-off, became a whiny spoiled brat who only cares about Japanese culture and nothing else.
    • Anahit, from Anahit (2014), also introduced in this spin-off, while tolerable, became a "rebel girl" stereotype.
    • The San Antonio Spurs Coyote is now reduced to a fanboy stereotype.
    • Lynn Loud Jr is now a bigger try-hard than she was to the point where in certain episodes she tries to be too extreme at times.
    • Felicia became even more of a toxic Olivia Rodrigo and The Pussycat Dolls stan than she was and also became obsessed with sex.
    • Baby Bonnie Hood, while sometimes remaining her original personality, is an extreme psycho and also can tend to be a pervert at times (although rarely).
    • The Globglogabgalab only exists for meme-bait. In fact, there's an entire episode dedicated to him, called "Who is the Globglogabgalab?" and it's nothing more than pure filler.
    • Ireland from Starch Brotherhood is way more alcoholic than before and he is now a wine lover who hates everyone who doesn't like alcoholic drinks.
    • Mirabel Madrigal is now a rehash of Rosa Diaz but worse and she won't stop bitching about not having a gift.
    • Pepa Madrigal has now serious anger issues and would kill anyone who will make Peppa Pig jokes about her.
    • Link became an angry person who hates Alastor and Randy just because they are overused a lot. He is also rude towards Nicole.
    • Lilith Aensland became an extremely whiny spoiled brat and dum-dum to Ness and Alisa. She is so rude, mean, and arrogant, and when things don't get her way, she starts throwing a fit.
    • The Narrator just feels like he is shoehorned into the show. The narrator is also voiced by Tom Kenny, the same voice as the narrator of SpongeBob SquarePants.
    • Cherri Bomb is now a jerk who nags and is rude to everyone. She is also a woman-child who is immature most of the time.
    • Sakura Kasugano became high and obsessed with cracking cocaine, who even teams up with Vibri.
    • Rem from Re:Zero is now obsessed with causing too much drama in the mansion for some unexplained reason.
    • Sea Fairy Cookie is now a Colorado fangirl, as she never takes her hands off him.
    • Unikitty has no problems with getting mad for any reason as her rage mode will show up very frequently.
    • Slushi is now obbssesed with hentai and Rule 34, especially of underage characters.
    • Ash Ketchum acts like how he did during the Black and White era, but 4 times as dumb.
  3. Most of the humor is sexual humor, pop culture references, or is mean-spirited.
    • Alisa asking for 100 Fettuccine Alfredos, 50 Cheese Raviolis, and Giant Breadsticks in "The Olive Garden Banquet"
    • Nicole Watterson throwing items at people in "Outside Job".
    • Steven Universe puking rainbows on a bird nest in "That's So Ness and Alisa!".
    • Ness and Lucas committing arson with PK Fire in "Whoops, All Fires!".
    • Mira stealing Loona's credit card to buy several Kpop albums, lightsticks, and other merch in "Outside Job".
    • Ness and Alisa bullying the LOL Surprise characters in "LMAO Surprise".
    • Lili De Rochefort calling Asuka Kazama "Ass-uka Cumzama" in "PK Bullcrap".
    • Zafina threatening to kill Princess Jasmine because she made a false claim on the internet that Disney ripped off her in "Goodbye Disney". Ironically, Princess Jasmine was introduced in 1992, while Zafina was introduced in 2007.
      • In fact, she wasn't even the actual Princess Jasmine, but rather someone cosplaying as her, as seen in the events of the episode.
    • Loona and Nicole Watterson getting devoured by Darkos in "Lunch Time!", which is considered vore!
    • Patrick Star spilling Icees and throwing snacks on the floor at a Buc-ee's gas station in "That Crap Time in Buc-ee's".
    • Ness and Alisa dressing up as SwaySway and Buhdeuce in "Ducks, Bread, and Butts".
    • Pit drinking Clorox Bleach in "PK Bullcrap". How did he manage to survive after drinking it? You will die if you drink that in real life!
    • Nicole Watterson fighting with Lili just because she interrupted her speech in "The Elevator".
    • El Chavo saying the F-word multiple times in "Please Stop, Alisa!".
    • Lucky Chloe buying a mansion filled with Macarons in "Macaron Palace".
    • Lili De Rochefort throws a tantrum just because she wasn't allowed to go to Blaze Pizza in "Lili visits Blaze Pizza".
    • The San Antonio Spurs Coyote rubbing Loona's butt in "All the Dumb-Crap!".
    • Ness slapping a blonde-haired woman in the face just became she won't stare at him in "The Creep".
    • Benny (Grevens Återkomst) defending Junior Eurovision: The Movie in "All the Dumb-Crap!".
    • Sayonara and Lucky Chloe having a picnic with Gene (The Emoji Movie) in "A Picnic with the Emojis".
    • Lili De Rochefort and Anahit fighting over what Domino (Ness and Alisa's pet guinea pig) should wear in "Dress it All Up!".
    • Ness and Alisa Bosconovitch flexing their diamonds in "Diamonds and Riches".
    • Loona and Kat vandalizing the arcade machines with vulgar words and stealing everyone's tokens and prizes in "One Night at Dave and Buster's".
    • Sunny (Omori) stabbing Ling Xiaoyu's Panda in the arm, which caused Xiaoyu to cry in "Nature, Ouch!".
    • Ness, Alisa Bosconovitch, Lili De Rochefort, Juri Han, Kirby, an Among Us character, Caillou, Nicole Watterson, Toon Link, Geo Guy, Ireland, Bubsy, Lynn Loud Jr, and Baby Bonnie Hood getting into a huge argument in "Member of the Hour".
    • The Notorious scene of Ness and Alisa Bosconovitch transforming into cattle after the latter accidentally added a poison that was meant for cattle in the potting mixture in "I Was a Teenage Cattle".
    • Paintbrush drinking a growth potion in "The Giant Paintbrush in the Mansion".
    • Perfect Peter feeding the Hungry Pumpkin a salad when he was supposed to give him a hot dog in "Lili and Talim at Hungry Pumpkin". Even Lili De Rochefort and Talim were aware of this!
    • Jin Kazama kissing Heihachi Mishima on the cheek in "Jin and Heihachi", which counts as incest, necrophilia, and otherwise makes no sense whatsoever because Heihachi was Jin's grandfather and that he hated Jin.
    • Paula Jones/Polestar and Mira teaming up to blast old K-Pop songs loud on the speakers in "95 Yummy Love".
    • Darkos saying the n-word in "What the Hell, Jeff?".
    • Ivy Valentine and Nicole Watterson slapping each other while saying slurs during at the prom in "The Bullcrap Prom Night".
    • Captain Falcon and Cassandra Alexandra (wearing lingerie) erotically moaning in the hot tub while having sex also in "Jin and Heihachi" as Mr. Kat records it and sends it to Discord, thankfully it was censored, but it's still disturbing and unnecessary. Even Ness and Alisa called them out for this.
    • Positions P3 accidentally losing all of Lucas's (Mother 3)' marbles, which caused him to yell and be upset in "Where's The Marbles?"
    • Flora (Winx Club) accidentally spraying a shrink potion on Talim in "Tiny Talim".
    • Ness and Alisa getting high on cocaine in "Fuckin' Pot Crap!".
    • The infamous running gag of Darkos asking Nicole Watterson to leak her nudes in "NicoleHub".
    • Paula Jones-Polestar breaking glass in "The Most Random Episode Ever!".
    • Bella Paige assassinating the president of Germany in "A German Stupid Time!".
    • The EarthBound Chosen 4, Alisa Bosconovitch, Ireland from Starch Brotherhood, Loona, Kat, Lynn Loud Jr., Setsuka, 2B, Anahit, Marie Rose, Baby Bonnie Hood, and Chun-Li having a potato fight in "Fuckin' Potatoes War".
    • The Among Us characters raiding the mansion in "The Mansion Raid!".
    • Lili De Rochefort visiting the Dark Web on her PC in "Sneaking Bad".
    • There is literally an entire episode dedicated to the "I'm a Pancake" meme, called "My Life as a Pancake".
    • Pokey Minch saying "Flirty Rats" when he smells Lili De Rochefort's farts in "Awkward Smile".
    • Juri Han complaining all because Paintbrush drank her Caramel Ribbon Frappuccino in "Thirsty Paintbrush".
    • Cherri Bomb making a poorly made robot to mock the others at the mansion in "Who is Cherri Bomb?".
    • Baby Bonnie Hood getting trolled by random Super Smash Bros. Ultimate players in "Smash Bros Online is Problematic".
    • Ness and Alisa accidentally swapping their bodies by a curse caused by someone unknown (later revealed to be Black Mamba P3) in "The Bodyswap".
    • Vibri and Sakura Kasugano getting high on cocaine in "Crack Moment".
    • Black Mamba P1 giving Lili De Rochefort a meal from Chick Fil A when she was supposed to give her a Salad in "My Big Fat Lili".
    • Ness getting drunk on vodka in "The Drinky Game".
    • Rem and Kumatora getting into a major brawl in "Around The Salty Drama".
    • Korra telling Lili that she should stop being friends with Talim, which caused her to get upset in "Lili vs. Korra".
  4. Some of the episodes have awful morals. Yes, we get that there were made for the use of irony or sarcasm, but some people might take this the incorrect way.
    • "The Olive Garden Banquet" shows that demanding someone to get you something is fine.
    • "Goodbye Disney" teaches that giving death threats to someone is okay.
    • "Member of The Hour" shows that having arguments with other people just because you are not the leader of the group helps.
  5. The theme song, while catchy, can be a bit annoying, as it is literally Just Ness and Alisa rapping random lines while doing random things during the sequence.
  6. Obvious use of product placement.
  7. It is filled to the brim with bad to mediocre episodes, such as:
    • Outside Job
    • Please Stop, Alisa!
    • The Olive Garden Banquet
    • Whoops, All Fires!
    • Mira at Target
    • That's So Ness and Alisa!
    • Ness vs. Toad
    • Meet The Serbians
    • LMAO Surprise
    • PK Bullcrap
    • Go Outside
    • Lunch Time!
    • Goodbye Disney
    • That Crap Time in Buc-ee's
    • Ducks, Bread, and Butts
    • Nicole is High, Again?
    • Rattata Kid's Big Trip!
    • Lili Visits Blaze Pizza
    • The Elevator
    • Macaron Palace
    • Ness Meets the Loud Siblings
    • Say Yes to the Distress
    • Pokey Minch and Captain Falcon
    • Lucky Chloe's Chaotic Train Ride!
    • All the Dumb-Crap!
    • Diamonds Riches
    • The Train
    • One Night at Dave & Buster's
    • Cold in Fort Lauderdale
    • Today's Funtime Special: Ness and Lucas Commit Arson
    • The Creep
    • Pocoyo Leaves the Group
    • A Picnic with the Emojis
    • Dress it All Up!
    • Sweet Smell of Škoda
    • Trix Idiot
    • The Werewolf Curse
    • Lili's Bakery
    • Who is the Globglogabgalab?
    • Member of the Hour
    • Nature, Ouch!
    • No Thank You, Next
    • Generation Z Humor
    • 2 Broke Latinas
    • Just Milking It
    • I Was a Teenage Cattle
    • Over-show Dream
    • A Alligator in the Pool!
    • Ness' Crap in Boca Raton
    • Go Ahead, The Wrong Way
    • The Giant Paintbrush in the Mansion
    • Lili and Talim at Hungry Pumpkin
    • Perfect Peter vs. The Rattata Kid
    • Jin and Heihachi
    • Ness and Alisa's Food Truck
    • 95 Yummy Love
    • What the Hell, Jeff?
    • The Bullcrap Prom Night
    • Ness vs. The Breadwinners
    • Pepper Ice Cream Sandwich
    • The Midnight Glow
    • A Crappy Night at the Mansion
    • FuckBound 3: Lucas the Coward
    • Where's The Marbles?
    • Stupid Video Game
    • Tiny Talim
    • Mayor Gumball
    • Shitty Butt Guns!
    • Henry Hates ITZY Stans
    • Really, Paula?
    • Summertime Strip
    • Don't Say Fuzzy Pickles
    • Hsien-Ko at Burger King
    • Fuckin' Pot Crap!
    • NicoleHub (infamous for being a Nicole torture episode, also considered to be one of the worst episodes of the show)
    • The Most Random Episode Ever!
    • FuckBound 4: PK Fire Arson
    • A German Stupid Time!
    • Are You Stupider than a 5th Grader?
    • Fuckin' Potatoes War
    • Ice Cream and Shit
    • The Chosen 4 vs. Team Doki
    • Doctor Alisa
    • The Mansion Raid!
    • Sneaking Bad
    • 100 PSI Episodes!
    • My Life as a Pancake
    • Awkward Smile
    • Thirsty Paintbrush
    • Who is Cherri Bomb?
    • Smash Bros Online is Problematic (mainly the main plot)
    • FuckBound 5: Paula Fucks Up!
    • The Shitty Macaron
    • A Stupid Long Trip!
    • Mushroom Smells
    • The Bodyswap
    • Buy La Per Sales
    • Crack Moment
    • Who Spilled The Milk?
    • Knock, Knock, Who's Gone?
    • My Big Fat Lili (a Lili torture episode)
    • The Sandwich Snub
    • Around the Salty Drama
    • Ness Hurts His Knee
    • The Drinky Game
    • Palutena's Perfect Math Class
    • Ness and Alisa Ask the World
    • Pickle Macaron
    • Rainy Day Lili
    • Ruptured Roadside
    • Sneaky Bulleta
    • The Rot of Food
    • Pirate Morons
    • Zephyrlilies Has Invaded Our Mansion!
    • Extra Cold Ice Cream Truck
    • Welcome to the Team, Wrath
    • Are You Still Feeling Sad, Kid?
    • A Shitty Time in Paris!
    • Beauty and The Bullshit
    • Oh, No! There's A Wasp in the Mansion!
    • No Phone Challenge
    • Draw to Baskin Robbins
    • Paula's Giant Donut
    • StarfireHub (a sequel episode)
    • Toilet Chilli
    • Bird Debate
    • Is That a Knife?!
    • Lili vs. Korra
    • Mario and Luigi's Pot of Spaghetti
    • The Return of Emperor Belos
    • Hasbro Propaganda
    • Paintbrush is in Heat?
    • The Shitty Hunt
    • Lili's Boneless Pizza
    • Mansion on Lockdown
    • Lili Meets BTS
    • The Return of Wrath (basically a re-hash of The Return of Slade)

UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Redeeming Qualities

  1. As usual, decent animation that captures the original style of the characters.
  2. There are still some likable characters, such as Ness' Mom, Tracy (Ness' little sister), Tony (EarthBound), The Runaway Five, Morrigan Aensland, Demitri Maximoff, Ling Xiaoyu, Nina Williams, Paul Phoenix, Lars Alexandersson, Claudio Serafino, Banjo, Kazooie, Spyro, Jigglypuff, Kid (Kid Cosmic), Ahri, Akali, Kai'Sa, Evelynn, Nahuel, Madoka Kaname, Starfy, Rosalina, Alice (Alice in Wonderland), Charlie Morningstar, Rakel Colt, Odo, Molly Mabray, Grace Thomas, Princess Zelda, Gumball Watterson, Inkling Girl (Splatoon), Estonia, Rosie Mayfield, Starfire (Teen Titans), Blossom, Mercy, Emmet Brickowski etc.
    • This spin-off also introduced some other likable characters like Anita (Darkstalkers), The Trix Rabbit, Musa, Poison (Final Fight/Street Fighter), Paper Mario, Simon (Gurren Lagann), Mikado Ryugamine (voiced by Justin Briner here), Tsukasa Hiiragi, and Kyon.
    • Domino (Ness and Alisa's pet guinea pig) is also a likable and cute original character.
  3. The theme song, despite being annoying at times, is catchy and danceable. In fact, it will probably make you want to listen to it on YouTube.
  4. There are good episodes, such as:
    • Prince Poo's Day Off
    • Heartbreak in the Clubhouse
    • Leverage Per Sea Bed
    • Rakel Colt's Secret
    • Alisa's Spa Day
    • Forever 24
    • Ness and Alisa's Guinea Pig
    • Live the Night for Orlando
    • A Completely Useless Episode
    • Ness & Alisa A303 Roadtrip
    • Baby Bonnie Hood at the Convention
    • Over the Water Bridge
    • That's PK Rockin!
    • The Story of Alice
    • How Not to Keep Up With the Kardashians (which even has appearances from the Kardashians themselves)
    • Broken Glass and Razor Blades
    • The Slow and the Calm
    • A Trip to the Beach, Anyone?
    • Visiting Dorset
    • Whatever Happened to the Disused Characters?
    • Goodbye, Wrath
    • The Ultimate Shopping Quest
    • Rosie Mayfield Waits for a Miracle
    • How Not to Keep Up With the Kardashians, Part 2
    • Kai'Sa at Barnes and Noble
    • Allen Walker, We'd Like You to Meet Alan Walker
    • The Ultimate Children's Card Game Tournament! (a crossover with Yu-Gi-Oh, along with "Attack of the Children's Card Games!" from The Crazy-Ass Group Show)
    • A Kijang In Florida? Whaaaaat?
    • PK FIRE PK THUNDER (despite having one of the worst episode titles)

UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Dialogue from the Show

Catchphrases

Ness: You know what time is it? It's Ness time!
Alisa Bosconovitch: For fuck's sake just get over it, dumbass!
UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Episodes

Ness: Can I lick your son's bar of chocolate?
Milo's dad: You twat.
Episode: Caramel-Filled Decadance (Season 1)

Olive Garden Worker: Hello, and welcome to Olive Garden! How can I help you?
Alisa Bosconovitch: Can I have 100 Fettuccine Alfredos, 50 Cheese Raviolis, and Giant Breadsticks Please?
Olive Garden Worker: You really want that much?!
Alisa Bosconovitch: I don’t care just give me the food!
Episode: The Olive Garden Banquet (Season 1)

Lola and Mila: Hi Ness and Alisa, would you like to play hide and seek with us?
Ness: Hell no! I’m too old for that crap!
Alisa Bosconovitch: What do you mean?
Episode: Meet The Serbians (Season 1)

Alisa Bosconovitch: C'mon! Why the fuck aren’t you answering the question?
Episode: PK Bullcrap (Season 1)

Nicole Watterson: GET YOUR FUCKING NASTY ASS HANDS OFF ME!!!

Loona: LET US OUT YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!
Nicole Watterson: I don't think he could hear us even when we are in his STOMACH!

Darkos: I-*burps* I am full. I can't fit anything into my guts!*burps* *faints*
Episode: Lunch Time! (Season 1)

Ness: So, it’s me, Alisa, Nicole, Mira, Lili, and a few others on the elevator at a hotel in Miami, Florida…
Hotel Elevator Speaker: Hello! Welcome to the luxury hotel elevator, tell us what floor number and we will take you there.
Nicole Watterson: Floor 13?
Hotel Elevator Speaker: Sorry, I didn’t hear that… please try again
Nicole Watterson: Like I said, it’s floor-
Lili Rochefort: I'm starting to get hungry, I’m craving some Quesadillas right now…
Nicole Watterson: Ughh!!! You interrupted my speech!
Hotel Elevator Speaker: Sorry, I didn’t hear that… please try again.
Nicole Watterson: You see, Lili, you caused this to happen!
Lili Rochefort: Nicole, I literally did nothing wrong to you, I was just saying that I was hungry.
Episode: The Elevator (Season 2)

Rattata Kid: What is going on?! Why the hell am I here?!
Episode: Rattata Kid's Big Trip! (Season 2)

Mira: Jungkook is my baby!
Milo's dad: No he's not.
Episode: Leverage Per Sea Bed (Season 2)

Ness: Look at all the money we have, we’re rich!
Alisa Bosconovitch: Ayy, look at how much diamonds we have!
Ness: Yeah, cause' we have the diamonds and riches!
Alastor: Hello Ness and Alisa! Can We join in the fun of both of your Diamonds and Riches?
Randy Marsh: Me Too, we both want to join in!
Ness: Of course, you can, Alastor and Randy!
Alisa Bosconovitch: Definitely!
Episode: Diamonds Riches (Season 2)

Alisa Bosconovitch: Why won't this train move faster any day now?
Maddie: Because this train is taking too long, this is why I hate these satanic things!
Episode: The Train (Season 2)

Josie Rizal: Wow, Fort Lauderdale looks very nice, just look at the beach.
Starfy: I agree.
Ness: Wait a minute… it's not sunny like usual in Florida, it’s about to rain.
Josie Rizal: Ness, you’re in a Peninsula, that's why the weather is dramatic here in Florida.
Episode: Cold in Fort Lauderdale (Season 2)

Alisa Bosconovitch: Yes! It’s finally my birthday! I'm so happy!
Alastor: Happy birthday to you, Alisa!
Randy Marsh: I'm going to bring you a special present.
Ness: Alisa, it's your birthday, I'm so excited, I’m gonna go crazy!
Josie Rizal: Here are the plans for Alisa's birthday, Nicole will take you to a restaurant, I'm going to order some Princess cake for Alisa, Randy and Alastor will prepare the decorations, Kirby and Toon Link are in charge of decorating the cookies and Ness will sing the birthday song.

Nicole Watterson: So Alisa, what restaurant do you want to go to?
Alisa Bosconovitch: I would love to get some Italian Food, especially chicken Alfredo.
Nicole Watterson: Okay!

Buc ee's Beaver: Oh my goodness, why are you people whining about Pocoyo?
Ness: Because he was bugging me and my fellow members, now Alisa's Birthday is ruined!
Pocoyo: But, but I had to since the birthday party sucked. It was boring, and Alisa didn't give me a single slice of her Princess cake!
Loona: Nobody gives a shit, Pocoyo!
Lynn Loud Jr: Yeah, besides, you are so spoiled and that you were being a straight-up asshole to Alisa and her fellow members! Now fuck off, you spoiled brat!

Alisa Bosconovitch: You know what? Pocoyo, get out of me and Ness's mansion, and never come back! EVER!
Pocoyo: Okay, geez.

Lili De Rochefort: Hey Pocoyo, It's time to go outside!
Pocoyo: Yay, I love going outside! I especially love the playground.
Lili De Rochefort: You’re not going to a playground you stupid, you're going to my Yellow Light. Now go take your fucking clothes off, you little whore.
Pocoyo: No, please stop! *sobs*
Episode: Pocoyo Leaves The Group (Season 2)

Ness: Okay guys, while Alisa is currently trying to go back to Miami, I have to give you a favor. You will take care of Domino, which is our pet guinea pig. Have fun!
Patrick Star: Any ideas on what the guinea pig should wear?
Anahit: Oh! The guinea pig should wear Red, Blue, and Apricot, you know the colors of Armenia!
Lili De Rochefort: No! It should wear Blue, White, and Red, the colors of France!
Anahit: It should wear Red, Blue, and Apricot!
Lili De Rochefort: *screams* NO! IT SHOULD WEAR BLUE, WHITE, AND RED!
Odo: Woah, calm down, there's no need to yell!
Lili De Rochefort: STAY THE FUCK OUT OF THIS!
Anahit: RED, BLUE, AND APRICOT!
Lili De Rochefort: BLUE, WHITE, AND RED!
Anahit: RED, BLUE, AND APRICOT!
Lili De Rochefort: BLUE, WHITE, AND RED!
Anahit: RED, BLUE, AND APRICOT!
Lili De Rochefort: BLUE, WHITE, AND RED!
Anahit: RED, BLUE, AND APRICOT!
Lili De Rochefort: BLUE, WHITE, AND RED!
Anahit (Simultaneously): RED, BLUE, AND APRICOT!
Lili De Rochefort (Simultaneously): BLUE, WHITE, AND RED!
Unikitty: SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Episode: Dress it All Up! (Season 2)

Maddie: What is that?
Poupenka: That over here is a Škoda Octavia RS.
Maddie: Petrol or diesel?
Stistko: Diesel, my friend.
Maddie: Fuck yes!
Episode: Sweet Smell of Škoda (Season 2)

Trix Rabbit: Wait? Who stole my cereal?
Kids: Silly rabbit, Trix are for-
Ness: Bro get off! *knocks out the kids*
Kids: *screams and runs away*
Ness: Anyways, silly asshole, Trix are for whores and that's why you have no bitches! Take that!
Gumball Watterson and Inkling Girl (Splatoon): *laughs*
Episode: Trix Idiot (Season 2)

Katarina Alves: Why the hell don't you read a book already?
Pit: Because I don't know how to read!

Ness: Holy Fucking Guacamole! I can't believe I just got high on sugar last night!
Episode: Generation Z Humor (Season 3)

Violetta Castillo: What is this group?
Kally Ponce: I had no idea, but we can't afford it.
Violetta Castillo: Then how would we both get a job!?
Alisa Bosconovitch: A job? I suggest you two to clean the entire mansion! Me and Ness have a party with Alastor and Randy to go to. Also, both of you take care of Domino, our pet Guinea Pig
Episode: 2 Broke Latinas (Season 3)

Lucky Prescott: Netflix gave my show 8 seasons in 3 years! I'm so happy!
Ness: Bruh. Just 3 freaking years?! What is wrong with you?
Episode: Just Milking It (Season 3)

Alisa Bosconovitch: Okay, I think we're done with the recipe. Now let's try it!
Ness: Okay! *Drinks It* Uh… I feel Kinda funny…
Alisa Bosconovitch: Don't worry, everything's fine- Wait? What the hell is happening? I don't feel so good!
Ness: Yeah, took me a second that I just realized… WE'RE BOTH TURNING INTO CATTLE!
Alisa Bosconovitch: This is not good at all! Alastor and Randy, we need your help to break the curse so we can back to Normal!
Ness: I Don't wanna- For Fuck's sake, please let this stop! *cries*
Kai'Sa: Oh My Gosh! What just happened?
Alisa Bosconovitch: So, I was just making a recipe, I added this one poison in the mixture. We were done with the recipe, then Ness drank it and felt funny, and I also drank it, and felt the same way. I soon realized I accidentally added a poison that wasn't meant for Us but rather Bulls and Cows. Now we're transforming into Cattle, and Ness is crying because of this.
Episode: I Was a Teenage Cattle (Season 3)

Poison (Final Fight/Street Fighter): There is an alligator in the pool at the Mansion! If you are swimming in it, Get out immediately!
Episode: A Alligator in the Pool! (Season 3)

Ness: I think, The food is good and Boca Raton is a beautiful place, but where is Alisa?
Baby Bonnie Hood: I don't know, but what the hell are Perfect Peter and D.Va doing?

Perfect Peter: STOP EATING MEAT AND BUYING MILK!!!
Boca Raton Local: But I was just eating a meal from Burger King…
D.Va: WE DON'T CARE, GO VEGAN AND SUPPORT THAT VEGAN TEACHER RIGHT NOW OR ME AND PETER ARE GOING TO RAID YOUR HOUSE!!!
Morrigan Aensland: Perfect Peter and D.Va, can both of you please stop? You two are being such a bad sport. Besides, she was just eating an impossible whopper, not an actual meat burger. Geez!

Ness: Ok, were to go next?
Baby Bonnie Hood: Let's explore the gardens.
Episode: Ness' Crap in Boca Raton (Season 3)

Alisa Bosconovitch: Uh, Paintbrush, why are you walking closer to me like that? I-
Paintbrush: *eats Alisa Bosconovitch*
Alisa Bosconovitch: *screams*

Nicole Watterson: Where the fuck are we?!
Loona: Are you seriously that fucking stupid? We are in Paintbrush's stomach right now!
Felicia: It smells like shit in here, please let us out!

Paintbrush: *eats Perfect Peter*
Perfect Peter: *screams*
D.Va: No! Peter! Please don't-
Paintbrush: *eats D.Va*
D.Va: *screams*
Paintbrush: Sorry, but I have to eat too! Besides, you two are annoying as hell! *burps*

Ness: Oh my gosh, Paintbrush, WHY ARE YOU SO BIG? Also, where in the F is Alisa?
Baby Bonnie Hood: Please don't…

Paintbrush: *looks at the hot tub* *meows*
Bomb: What is going on? Stay here, Agnes! I'll investigate what is going-
Paintbrush: *eats Bomb and Agnes*
Bomb: ON!
Paintbrush: *licks their lips* *stomach grumbles* Well... *groans* guess I should eat someone else...

Alastor (singing): We've got a pizza delivery car!
Randy Marsh and Alastor (singing): And we're delivering pizza!
Randy Marsh (singing): We've got a pizza delivery car!
Randy Marsh and Alastor (singing): And we're gonna go all over-
Paintbrush: *eats the pizza delivery car*
Randy Marsh and Alastor: *scream*

Toon Link: What the fuck are you doing?
Ness: *screaming* I HAD NO IDEA THAT PAINTBRUSH SHALLOWED ALISA.
Toon Link: What to do about it?
Ness: *operatic voice* I had no idea why I’m singing this song, but I feel bad for Alisa. This is pure torture. AAAAAAAAAAAAA
Paintbrush: *eats Ness*
Phone: *ringing while "Bim Bam Toi" by Carla plays*
Baby Bonnie Hood: Hello? Josie, do you know where are you?
Josie Rizal: Oh, I'm currently in Kissimmee. I fled there because I heard on the News that Paintbrush is eating most if not every resident of Miami.
Baby Bonnie Hood: Oh gosh, I HEARD THAT. PLEASE DON'T EAT ME…
Paintbrush: *eats Baby Bonnie Hood* Well, it's too late now!

Paintbrush: Ugh... Why do I feel so... Oh god! *vomits everyone they ate back out* *goes back to their normal size* What... Just happened?
Episode: The Giant Paintbrush in the Mansion (Season 3)

Lili De Rochefort: So, why are we here?
Talim: I don't know, but we're at Hungry Pumpkin.
Hungry Pumpkin: *walks in* I'm very hungry. *sits at table* Give me the salt.
Lili De Rochefort: I don't know how to do this, but whatever. *Gives him the salt*
Hungry Pumpkin *eats the salt* give me the Juice.
Talim: I hate this, but let's do it anyway. *gives him the juice*
Hungry Pumpkin: *eats the juice* Give me the hot dog.
Perfect Peter: *comes out of nowhere* Stop eating meat for crap's sake! *gives him a salad*
Hungry Pumpkin: *throws salad* No! I don't want that! Give me the hot dog.
Lili De Rochefort: Hey, Peter, you ruined it! Also, shut up and get out of here, you piece of shit Gary Stu. *points her middle finger at Peter*
Loona: I'll give him a hot dog.
Episode: Lili and Talim at Hungry Pumpkin (Season 3)

Rattata Kid: I eat meat, I have pets, and I'm not going to be vegan! Try me, Peter! You can still love animals and eat animal products! And I would never support PETA!
Perfect Peter: Go vegan, stop owning animals, and support That Vegan Teacher and PETA right now!
Rattata Kid: You can't tell me what to do!
Episode: Perfect Peter vs. The Rattata Kid (Season 3)

Ness: *in high pitched voice* WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?
San Antonio Spurs Coyote: It's a Pepper Ice cream Sandwich.
Alisa Bosconovitch: I had no idea what to say, but it's disgusting as fuck!
Lili De Rochefort: Can I have one?
San Antonio Spurs Coyote: Sure, you can.
Ness: Who eats a Pepper Ice Cream Sandwich? I would rather eat the original!
Episode: Pepper Ice Cream Sandwich (Season 3)

Positions P3: *walks and spills the marbles* whoops!
Lucas (Mother 3): W-what the hell happened to my marbles?!
Positions P3: Uhhhhh… I don't know.
Lucas (Mother 3): I can't believe you would… not know where they are! *cries*
Episode: Where's The Marbles? (Season 4)

Ness: You're cringe, Peely!
Episode: Stupid Video Game (Season 4)

Horrid Henry: ITZY sucks. They literally sound like chipmunks!
Popo (Ice Climbers): *nods*
Nana (Ice Climbers): *nods*
ITZY Stan: Eat a dick, mother fucker!
Mira: Yeah!
Gaia Cauchi: *facepalms*
Ness' Mom: What the hell is going on?
Episode: Henry hates ITZY Stans (Season 4)

Ness: It's summertime dumbass! Take your clothes off, and I mean ALL OF IT.
Alisa Bosconovitch: Yes, it feels so fucking good!
Molly Mabray: But, I can't do it… It's disturbing…
Alisa Bosconovitch: You know what Ness said… take your clothes off.
Rakel Colt: Are you fucking kidding me, Ness and Alisa?
Brain Griffin: Ugh here we go again…

Ness: Ahh yes, it feels so good with no clothes on, Cause it's summertime.
Episode: Summertime Strip (Season 4)

Camera Man: Say Fuzzy Pickles!
Ness: Oh hell no!
Episode: Don't Say Fuzzy Pickles (Season 4)

Ness: This is boring, I wonder what we can do…
Giygas: Ness, Ness, Ness, Ness, Ness, Ness, Ness, Ness, Ness, Ness, Ness, Ness.
Ness: Ugh! What the fuck do you want?!
Giygas: Chill out boy. Today I'm going to visit your mansion once again.
Ness: Okay, but can you please stop saying my name over and over again every time you talk to me?
Giygas: Sorry, force of habit.
French Narrator: Later…
Alisa Bosconovitch: Paula, what's with that face?
Paula Jones-Polestar: Um… because Giygas is staying in the mansion for not a day, nor a week, but a month! So that's why.
Episode: Giygas Stays In (Season 4)

Alisa Bosconovitch: Get Ready…
Ness: Okay!
Paula Jones-Polestar: *screams* *breaks the glass*
Alisa Bosconovitch: No! That's not how it works!
Episode: The Most Random Episode Ever! (Season 4)

Darkos: Hey Nicole, can I leak your nudes?
Nicole Watterson: *cries* No! Don't!

Darkos: Oh, it's time! *puts on pornographic video of Nicole*
Loona: Why would you?!
Evelynn: What the fuck is wrong with you, Darkos?
Prince Poo: What is with all the content in the video!? I think I’m gonna… *vomits*
Ness: *gasps* DARKOS, GET YOUR ASS HERE RIGHT NOW!
Darkos: What?
Ness: I can't believe you would show that! That is very inappropriate, what had you done to Nicole?! Did you realize that you are not supposed to show porn videos in front of the mansion?!
Alisa Bosconovitch: Yeah! You crossed the line! You should be ashamed of yourself. So, me and Ness demand you to apologize to Nicole and promise to never do that stuff never again, or else…
Lilith Aensland: Shut Up! Darkos did nothing wrong, you are just being assholes to Darkos. Did you realize all the effort he put into that video?! I don't give a shit about minors being in the mansion. Now fuck off, Annoying kid from Super Smash Bros!
Ness: *cries* STOP! All I did was to tell Darkos to not show that video again, and yet you defended him.
Alisa Bosconovitch: This shows how whiny you are!
Lilith Aensland: But, I-
Loona: Shut Up, Lilith!
Episode: NicoleHub (Season 4)

Alisa Bosconovitch: Oh my fucking gosh, why are there so many potatoes?
Paula Jones-Polestar: I'm not surprised. How did this manage to happen?

Ireland (Art's Animations): I'm getting sick of this right now. *throws a potato*
Ness: What the actual fuck!? *throws a potato*
Episode: Fuckin' Potatoes War (Season 4)

Among Us Crewmate: Let's raid the mansion!
Episode: The Mansion Raid! (Season 4)

Ness: Holy hell, This is vibrant.
Alisa Bosconovitch: On the plus side, It's all in it's glory.
Lili De Rochefort: Stop at Popham services!
Episode: Ness & Alisa A303 Roadtrip (Season 4)

Lili De Rochefort: *farts*
Pokey Minch: *smells Lili's fart* Flirty Pigs.
Episode: Awkward Smile (Season 5)

Juri Han: Ugh!! I can't believe Paintbrush drank my Caramel Ribbon Frappuccino!
Episode: Thirsty Paintbrush (Season 5)

Cherri Bomb: So, what do you think, assholes?
Ness: *laughs*
Cherri Bomb: Wait, what is so funny about it?
Alisa Bosconovitch: It's face. I mean, look at it.

Prince Poo: What is wrong with you?! Why would she make that?
Paula Jones-Polestar: Yeah. I don't get why Ness is laughing.
Episode: Who is Cherri Bomb? (Season 5)

Baby Bonnie Hood: Oh, my, why is it lagging? What is with these people spamming moves?! What the fuc-
Episode: Smash Bros Online is Problematic (Season 5)

Ness: Alisa, you been driving for over a lot of hours. Where are we?
Alisa Bosconovitch: Where in… Key West, Florida. So, Ness, we are still in the same state.
Paula Jones-Polestar: Can somebody help? I don't feel well.
Felicia: Oh No…
Ness: Paula, are you okay?
Paula Jones-Polestar: Nope.
Lili De Rochefort: You just said to Ness that you are not okay. If so, are you carsick?
Paula Jones-Polestar: Sadly, Yes.
Nicole Watterson: Poor Paula…
Episode: A Stupid Long Trip! (Season 5)

Lucas (Mother 3): Wait, what? What is fuck is that?!
Poison (Final Fight/Street Fighter): I have no idea.
Episode: Mushroom Smells (Season 5)

Kumatora: *looks at sale sign for sodas* Buy 3, get one free, oh, nice! Such a great bargain! *picks up the box of sodas*
Perfect Peter: *puts down box of sodas* Don't buy that soda!
Kirby: Why would you tell her not to buy the soda?
Episode: Buy La Per Sales (Season 5)

Vibri: Hey Sakura, do you want to get high on cocaine?
Sakura Kasugano: Of course, Hell yeah!
Episode: Crack Moment (Season 5)

Talim: Who spilled the freaking milk?
Lucas (Mother 3): It ain't me!
Talim: So, who is it? I want to know…
Ness: If you don't know, why can't you just clean it up? *facepalms*
Episode: Who Spilled The Milk? (Season 5)

Mikado Ryugamine *inside his Subaru Legacy 2.5 GT Spec B, looking at his Xperia XZ1* Hey, want me to tell you a secret?
Lucas (Mother 3): What is it?
Mikado Ryugamine: *starts whispering* Listen up, I'm the boss of Japan's 8th largest crime syndicate, the Dollars, and we currently plan on assasinating the Kardashian clan.
Lucas (Mother 3): Your gang must be insane!
Mikado Ryugamine: Don't worry. We're a band of philanthropists, too.
Episode: How Not to Keep Up With the Kardashians (Season 5)

Ness: Ow, my knee!
Alisa Bosconovitch: Aww, what happened?
Ness: I spin around, I wouldn't stop spinning, but then, I HURT MY KNEE. It hurts so bad!
Episode: Ness Hurts His Knee (Season 5)

Rem (Re:Zero): Forget about this mansion, I will just mess with everyone!
Episode: Around the Salty Drama (Season 5)

Lili De Rochefort: *cries* Why?!
Lucas (Mother 3): Lili, why are you crying?
Lili De Rochefort: This day is sad!
Ness: Lili, are you okay?
Episode: Rainy Day Lili (Season 5)

Kyon: What's with all this broken glass here? Did anything bad happen?
Episode: Broken Glass and Razor Blades (Season 5)

Rem (Re:Zero): Shut it, grandma!
Vibri: YOU SHUT IT!
Paula Jones-Polestar: How about the both of you shut it! Geez!
Episode: Ruptured Roadside (Season 6)

Wrath: Oh, hi there. Just wondering whether or not I can join in after getting booted off the Crazy-Ass Group.
Mikado Ryugamine: You're welcome, kiddo.
Ness: Welcome to the team.
Alisa Bosconovitch: I'm going to remind you that, Ness and I didn't leave the group, we just wanted to be nice to those who were booted off or left the group.

Wrath: Check this out! *contorts into a pretzel shape*
Episode: Welcome to the Team, Wrath (Season 6)

Alisa Bosconovitch: What's wrong? Still feeling sad there, kid?
Wrath: Damn right I do. Still can't get over how those bastards Randy and Alastor basically kicked me out.
Episode: Are You Still Feeling Sad, Kid? (Season 6)

Alisa Bosconovitch: Anyone fancy a trip to the Unnamed Beach?
Ness: That sounds nice.
Allen Walker: I'm in.
Wrath: Yeah, me too!
Episode: A Trip to the Beach, Anyone? (Season 6)

Ness: I'm sorry, but Wrath, looks like you have to go. You stayed in the mansion for long enough and looks it's time for you to leave.
Wrath: Why, just why?
Alisa Bosconovitch: It seems that the writers aren't interested in you anymore.
Lili De Rochefort: Not only that, but the fan letters said that they want more comedic episodes and that we got to have something the fans want.
Baby Bonnie Hood: It was a great time meeting you, but you had to go, I hope you enjoy the rest of your life. Farewell, kid.
Wrath: Screw you guys, I'm out of here.
French Narrator: Not long after...
Alisa Bosconovitch: Welp, he's finally gone. Time to relax.
Lucas (Mother 3): I was in my room at Paula's villa when Wrath left. I also heard that he left Florida. Where could he be?
Alisa Bosconovitch: I have no idea. He's probably in Hawaii or maybe Puerto Rico.
Lucas (Mother 3): Oh, okay. Thanks.
French Narrator: Now what about Wrath? The audience needs to see what happened to him, of course!
Episode: Goodbye, Wrath (Season 6)

Engineer (TF2): How's the stargazy pie and clotted cream, kids?
Lili De Rochefort: Awesome!
Episode: Devon & Cornwall Trip (Season 6)

Alisa Bosconovitch: Huh, I hear something weird flying in the mansion.
Lili De Rochefort: I need to wonder what that thing could be…
Ness: I would kill it with my fly swatter- hold up… this isn't a fly.
Alisa Bosconovitch: I- oh my goodness! I just realized that there is a wasp in the mansion!
Ness: *screams*
Episode: Oh, No! There's A Wasp in the Mansion! (Season 6)

Allen Walker: Alan Walker? Who could that be? And why does his name sound almost just like mine?
Episode: Allen Walker, We'd Like You to Meet Alan Walker (Season 6)
UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Trivia

  • This is the first media overall that portrayed Ness and Alisa Bosconovitch with ADHD and Asperger's syndrome respectively.
  • This is also the first media that depicted Lili De Rochefort as a bisexual.
  • Season 1 and Season 2a both take place in Florida. While Season 2b, while Ness is still in Florida, Alisa was at San Antonio, Texas, as she fled there after the Pocoyo characters were throwing trash at her in "Pocoyo Leaves the Group" and she is attempting to go back to Florida. In "Trix Idiot", Alisa was still shown to be in Texas, but as of the events in "Member of the Hour", Alisa finally returned to Florida.
  • Just like how he gave each season of The Crazy-Ass Group Show nicknames, PhantomStrider assigned nicknames to each season of this series.
    • A Not-So Fun Start (Season 1)
    • Graveyard for Debatably Sympathetic Anime Characters (Season 6)
    • Lili's Show (Season 7)
  • A few episodes have been released onto VHS.

Episodes With Their Own Pages

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